It's been a while since I've wrote on a blog, or at least a visible one. But I woke up feeling not very well today and psychology tells me that writing will untangle the crooked vines in my mind and free me of some of this negativity. So why not write it somewhere private I ask myself? Well I guess I also want the satisfaction of knowing that someone out there might be reading this and maybe that can be a little bit therapeutic for me as well.
I see these blog things as if they were windows. I can see pretty clearly through the window, peering into my friend's lives, pondering and wondering. But I'm still missing something, separated by glass, I'm never really there. And glancing through these windows I'm often reminded of things I don't want to remember and don't want to experience again.
But alas I have to. They say curiosity killed the cat, and it pretty much kills me all the time. Last night I had a good time with an old friend and a couple new friends. If I'm drinking though, there's one thing you need to take away from me. It's not my car keys or my car for that matter, it's my cell phone. Drunk phone calls and drunk texts have only made matters worse in my life but I never learn the lesson. It seems I've lost many loved ones because of my phone, and as lame as that sounds, at least I don't lose them via AIM or something (although I have fallen in love through AIM, ^,^). Sleeping at 4 AM I also had a bunch of not so wonderful dreams that left me waking up in despair. And aside from learning some new beats on the drums I've had a pretty crappy day. Lonely, stupid, abandoned, pointless, broken is how I feel and how I am. I guess the worst part about it is that it's not just a one day thing, it's pretty much everyday. Oh well!
And oops, this was supposed to be a photography/music blog. But I kind of failed at the music half of that. Was trying to write a piano song I entitled "Window" but that was pretty much fail. Oh, and the windows in this photograph are closed and boarded. Let's just hope that the words on your screen are enough of a window for now.
philessthanthree.
